Why Do I Do This?

So on the trip, I became friendly w/ this guy, Alan Levine, who came alone. He's 56 and belongs to the Temple but doesn't go there much because he goes w/ his mother in another city. (red flag 1 - Mother thing). He usually goes to services on Saturday mornings and volunteers at Bingo. Everyone seems to know him.

I started out chatting w/ him on the bus, just sitting across from him, and I sat w/ him sometimes at breakfast. (I usually came up to him and sat down)...He came out to dinner w/ a small group of us a couple times, and I sometimes hung near him when we were all touring someplace. He also hung with me one night when some of us went shopping after a group dinner. I was surprised to see him get off the bus - it seemed as if he came along because of me (the other people were coupled up- Alice and Mark, Paul and Lisa (although they aren't a "couple".) He kind of easily went along with me - I said - will you come to this place with me - and he hung with me like a puppy. I asked him, and Phil to go back with me to the Arab Market when I wanted to buy my rings and they came along willingly, although Phil seemed more into it than Alan was. Since he wasn't doing much shopping, I don't think it mattered to him where he went..

He told me a lot about himself, but mostly because I asked. He didn't ask me much about myself (I find most guys are like that -- and I tend to volunteer the info anyway)...He told me he was an unemployed software engineer, but turns out that he hasn't worked in a few years... (red flag#2). he also smokes (red flag#3), which I teased him about just a bit... I also doubt he's ever married (red flag #4) altho I didn't ask anything about that. I asked him where he grew up (Brighton), where he went to school (Boston Latin, Colby and BU). He told me where he's worked - Boeing, the big dig.. doing programming but I have no details. We even talked about him being in AZA (which he said he liked better than USY because they partied more)

Sharyn, one of the women on my trip who had been observing us, was sure he'd "ask me out" before the trip ended, but even though we shared a cab home (w/ Phil) he said nothing. He was friendly and funny and intelligent and easy to talk to, although very geeky - the kind I always fall for. Frankly, I was surprised that I enjoyed the company of a guy 10 yrs older than I am. My "type" is always younger. Sharyn doesn't know, however, that he is considered "eccentric" and an "enigma" by those at the temple... I'm wondering if he's either 1) an eccentric millionaire, or 2) an ex-con trying to start a new life. lol

So long story short - the night we got back, (when I was up at 4 AM), I sent him a nice, chatty email - somewhat long - but I had told him I'd send him some networking information (job listings etc) and he'd given me his card, ostensibly for that purpose. But he hasn't replied back. I had hoped for just a hello and thanks, nothing big. I also suggested that if he was interested, we could help each other network w/ IT contacts etc... Obviously he's not. I'd even just be friends with him (he lives down the street) but I figure the fact that he hasn't emailed me back isn't a good sign...but isn't it rude??? It's not like we met in a bar -- we all became friends on this trip.

Isn't this the 21st Century version of waiting by the phone??? I hate this. I was perfectly happy and then I meet some guy and boom - instant neurotic. I've actually been depressed because of this.. I hate that.

I'm going to see him eventually in Temple (well, at a scheduled thing - I've never actually seen him at a service) but I really don't think that I was even on his radar. He was too busy noticing smoking women (in restaurant) and tattooed women (at the Dead Sea)
I even gave him a hug goodbye when he was going to shake my hand.. I'm such a slut.

I also just talked to Sarah Liberman, who remembers him vaguely from the Saturday services and lunches afterwards. I believe her exact words were: "I think he hangs out with Morris Finklestein"... oy (red flag # 5??) but she says she saw him last fall when they all took Doris out for lunch. He came because of Morris. She also made a point of saying - "but he's a really nice guy... probably very shy.. " Yes, well, Theresa told me I was WEAK - and I am - I sent him another shorter email, to kind of apologize for the first one. I know he's online too!!! Because he has AOL and I put his screen name into my buddy list.. heh heh... not that I'm a STALKER or anything!!!

I spent the afternoon w/ Eric - watching him while he raked leaves at his mothers.. Thank goodness for him or I'd go crazy. Then neither of us wanted to go home on such a nice day so we went for a drive around Saugus and then went back to his apt to watch the Sox. I showed him how to view my photos online... I wondered if I'd run into you know who since he lives there too.
Really, I'm too old for this. I'm depressed - just because he won't email me back!! And I know when he's online too -- thanks to AOL. So now it's Monday - I know that he looked at my photos, but that's it.. no reply to either of my emails.... so I'm an idiot. Well shoot - tell me something I don't know. He's been online a number of times since I emailed him.. can't he at least just say HI? The Rabbi actually called him "an enigma"...Alice wasn't quite as kind, and the other women said that I can "do better"... not at my age... what was it about him that I liked?